Yay! I've met my end of March goal :D

One of the positive things that I incorporate into my life these past few months is exercise. I've been trying to exert more effort to add physical activities to my day. My goal was to reach 122 Ibs by end of March. Guess what? I weighed earlier and I'm 121.6 Ibs. Yay! My weight when I started was 129.3 Ibs and that was four months ago. It was definitely a slow process but I don't mind it! Go me! To all of us, we can definitely do it!

Been away... hopefully for the better

I've been away again for a long time. Maybe I was hiding. Maybe my mind is so cluttered I cannot form my words. I've done a lot of thinking. I've started many posts but didn't end up finishing them or didn't have the courage to post for the world to see. I've read about differences between men and women in relationships, in how they think, etc. In these gender generalizations, although I'm a woman I always identified myself as more of a masculine type. For example, when I have problems, I keep them to myself instead of chatting about it with girlfriends or other people. So yes, I was "caving" these past few months. And yes, I can open up right now because I have sort some issues and make some sense out of them.

I want to be a better me. After graduate school, I have lost a big chunk of my self-confidence that I felt lost of who I was before graduate school. As I started my postdoc, I felt elated and relieved that I am finally done with school. However, as I get settled in my new position, waves of fear and anxiety set in and I felt drowning into them. I did not face my fears head on during graduate school that they continue to affect me now.

I choose to face them now. I choose to be reunited with who I really am. I choose to dream again.